The following post is in answer to a question that was asked in relation to the post “A little word about living in the present moment.” If you would like to view the previous post here is the link,but I like to think that this post stands on its own whether or not you view the previous post. The question was as follows:
For me this is one of the toughest lessons to teach myself. I truly relate to celebrating small improvements, however, this still remains my greatest personal challenge. I would be interested to hear your perspective on how to remain focused in the present moment when there and those around me still wanting to discuss negative experiences from the past?
1. I have trouble recalling what exactly happened.
2. I don’t want to allow myself to return to a place of negative feelings.
Thank-you for your question Sherryn!
My answer is…
I totally hear what you’re saying, and I know it’s not always easy staying focused in the present moment, especially when there are many things going on around you that you may be focusing on and having many different thoughts about.
It’s usually all the thoughts we’re having about whatever it is we’re observing that maybe preventing us from staying present, especially if our thoughts are judgemental or negatively based.
Since others are bringing to you negative experiences from the past, it may be an indication that whatever they are bringing to you is something you also need to move to a better feeling place about?
Only you will know this because only you know how you feel in relation to whatever information they are bringing to you. And even if it is something you feel you need to move vibrationally on, it is for you to choose if that is the time and place you wish to try to do it, because you now have someone else’s input and vibration to deal with.
Sometimes it can be better or easier to move on subjects when you are on your own with your own thoughts, for doing it around others that are negatively focused takes immense power and strength of focus to do, for not only are you trying to move yourself to a better feeling place, now you may have taken on the task or burden of having to move them to a better feeling place also.
The fact that you are not remembering clearly what they are trying to rehash or bring up again is a great sign, it’s a sign you have not held on to negative emotions in relation to this experience, you have moved forward, and thinking about this even if it happened in the not too distant past feels like another life ago.
I would not try to remember negative details about something that you know you have moved forward on. If the person you are communicating with is important to you, you may wish to try and generally steer them in a more positive direction… but remember some people will not be easily moved from where they are, for they believe strongly in their perspective of what has happened and will point out to you, all the evidence that’s around them to support and justify how they feel and where they are! If this happens you are better to either casually redirect the conversation to something completely different, but if that doesn’t work, leave the conversation entirely!
This is not rude and can be done in a pleasant way. ( everyone needs to go to the toilet sooner or later ) Hehehe!!
But seriously, this is the kindest action you can take, for you do not do yourself any favours by focusing on what someone else has to say regarding everything that isn’t working in their life, and it definitely doesn’t do them any good either for they just create more power and momentum behind what they are not wanting by speaking of it to others, for the Law of Attraction is responding to their vibration in-kind just as it is to ours.
If they are trying to bring your attention to everything they perceive is not working in your life, do not take part in any way in these types of conversations. We cannot listen to people saying such things without including this is our vibration, especially if they are someone who is important to us or that we respect. You will know and you will feel if people are giving you advice and it’s coming from a pure non-resistant place, even if it isn’t 100% positive.
For me the easiest way I find to bring myself back into the present moment, is to find something around me, anything, it doesn’t really matter what it is, and focus intently and positively upon it to the exclusion of everything else, for this must bring you into the now, even if it is for a short period of time to begin with, for as you practice it more and more it starts to become more of your normal way of being!!
But be warned, many will see you as strange or weird, for they will say, “look at that happy one over there, why are they so happy? Look at everything that is happening around them!” And you will know what you have done to get there, and through knowing the power of who you are, you will be an example to others of what is possible, for when we get power and momentum behind us, it’s so good!!
And so our journey together continues…
That depends entirely on what from the past you are focused on.
If you are remembering something and are feeling positive emotion about it, this is an indication you are creating something now, with positive thoughts and emotions (vibrations) in your future that you are wanting, and as you maintain that positive feeling place, over time you create both power and momentum with your focused thoughts. As you continue to maintain a good feeling, high-flying vibrational place, the physical manifestation of something that matches or is similar to how you are feeling must come. It is Law!!
If we are looking back and remembering positive experiences but comparing them to where we are now and wishing we could go back in time or regretting where we are now, this is not so good. When we focus on anything, we emit a vibration (thoughts and emotions) and if we’re feeling dissatisfaction and regret, the Law of Attraction responds in-kind, (receives your vibration and matches it with similar thoughts and physical manifestations to let you know where you are and what you are creating) so with enough attention to these negative feeling thoughts, we create more momentum, and as the thoughts of dissatisfaction or regret are maintained, you will eventually experience unwanted manifestations that match or feel similar to the thoughts that created it.
It is not possible to believe that life is a struggle and things generally don’t work out how we’re wanting and experience the opposite of that.
I hear you when you say “but this has been my experience, this is the truth, there is evidence everywhere supporting what I think” and I know, we don’t make up unwanted stuff for the fun of it, but if you wish to experience something other than what you are, you must find something right now, from where you are, that you can focus on that feels better than what you are now experiencing.
I know it’s not easy when this has not been taught to us as we were growing up, but what is the alternative?
The saying, “when it rains it hails” didn’t come from nowhere. This is a clever way of saying as you focus on anything whether it be positive or negative (although this saying is definitely orientated towards negative experiences) you will get more of it, if it’s something wonderful that you’re wanting to experience more of, awesome, focus on it more, whereas if it’s unwanted experiences you do not want more of, you must change your focus to something that feels better. (actually, you don’t have to do anything, but you know what I mean!!)
It’s a good idea to start with something that’s easy, a subject that is not the most important thing in the world to you, for as you have success with subjects that are more easily moved to a better feeling vibrational place, over time you will notice the improvement in your life experience, giving you a stronger belief that you can change circumstances in your life for the better if that’s what you’re wanting!
Although we are pre-paving our future experiences with how we’re feeling now, and how we’re feeling now may come from many experiences we’ve had in the past, it’s true to say, it has to be good enough to want to feel good now, not tomorrow, not next week, not next year, now!
Look for the best that is around you from where you are standing right now, if we’re waiting for circumstances to improve before we allow ourselves to feel better, that is a backwards way of going about it, and often cannot be with subjects that have a lot of power and momentum in a negative direction behind them.
So if you can think of things from the past in a positive manner, that’s great and would be time well spent, but if you cannot think about the past in a positive light put your attention on something else that does feel good.
This can be the reason why many are experiencing similar negative circumstances in their life over and over again, for every time we think negative thoughts and feelings about the past, although they are new creations with new thoughts, they have the vibrational emotional content of previous hurts or pain that we then bring into our vibration NOW, which the Law of Attraction responds to with similar circumstances being created again, and unfortunately over time, if our vibration on this subject does not improve, experiences often become worse and worse until we find a way to let go and move to a better vibrational place.
Nothing stays the same but things do not need to get worse and worse, once we take control of our mind, things can only get better and better, and that’s the truth!!
And so our journey together continues….