The “Best Decision”….Is not always the easiest decision that gives us the quickest gratification!!!

SaharaBird
Although I have used the description “best decision” in the title, in reality there is no decision that is ultimately the best decision to make. There definitely are choices that will reap better results than others, but any decisions we firmly make that we’ve put all our positive thoughts and feelings behind are good decisions.

It’s true that not many people like not feeling good, actually I don’t think I know anyone who likes not feeling good, that being said, sometimes the need to feel instant gratification or to remove or change circumstances that make us feel uncomfortable immediately, can sometimes cause us to make a choice that short-term may help us to feel better, but long-term does not move anyone in a direction we’re wanting to go in.

This can be especially true when dealing with the little people we may have in our lives, our children. They come forward from Non-Physical with a stronger knowing of who they are than any previous generations, and are not easily guided away from that knowing by others that have been here longer than they have and have mostly forgotten who they really are.

Although coming froward with this strong knowing is very good news….For many it does require some different parenting styles to be learned if we’re wanting to be parents that guide and inspire the best out of our children. From harsh control and discipline, to letting them do whatever they like as long as they’re happy, and we’re happy as we see them happy approach, the middle ground between these two extremes is a good place to aim for.

I know we love our children very much, and it makes us feel very happy to see them happy, and this is a great thing, but when we base our decisions on what will make them the happiest in the short-term so we don’t have to deal with the often unpredictable (or sometimes very predictable!!) extreme behaviours that can follow not getting what they want or from experiencing the natural consequences of their choices, this is not usually in their best interests and does not help them to understand how this Universe is really working, and well, that’s not ideal. (I’ve said that very softly!!)

It’s true, we can do things and make decisions that prevent them from experiencing the full consequences of their actions. The problem with doing this is it makes it hard for them to see the connections between how the choices they make bring semi-predictable consequences which can cause them to start making decisions without the knowledge of what could possibly happen…..Which is ok when we’re always there to make everything alright, (Well, no it isn’t ok, but I think you probably know what I mean) but we must at some level accept that they will eventually be without someone who is prepared to dedicate their life to making sure everything runs smoothly for them. Someone that will run around and try to make their experience better by trying to prevent them experiencing the consequences from the choices they’ve made!! No, they will not find another who will do this for them….

Of course no one wants their children to experience strongly unwanted circumstances, and I think most of us would try to lessen this happening if we knew such circumstances were coming, but that’s exactly why it’s important to let them experience the small unwanted consequences of their actions, because once they’re aware of the link between what they’re choosing and what’s turning up, and it becomes a strong knowing and awareness they have based on their own first hand experiences….Now they are so well prepared with what they need to know to be on their own and create what they’re wanting in their own lives!!

And I believe it would be very hard to find a parent that didn’t want that for their children….But that’s just me….

And so it is….

I’ve been waiting for acceptance & approval from my parents for so long….

KnowThySelf
Unfortunately many people are not allowing themselves to really feel happy because they are waiting for one or both of their parents unconditional love and acceptance.
And of course it’s wonderful when we feel we have their love and approval, but if this is not the case, it’s often because each generation, in their own right is different to previous generations, (that’s what they call progress I think!!) and for many people who are not very accepting of change or are wishing others were different to what they really are, (or maybe more obedient than they are) this can be difficult for them to accept and be happy about.
If you do not feel like you have received the love, acceptance or approval you thought your parents should have given you as you were growing up (and possibly presently too?) The most important thing to know is….Their inability to love unconditionally is far more about them than it is about you!

If our parents were not feeling good about something we were or were not doing, it was their inability or not knowing how to move themselves into a better feeling vibrational place that caused them to look on us with negative emotions or judgements, rather than us being wrong. Of course we did things that may not have been ideal, but that is the purpose they were there, to teach and guide us in a “positive way.”
It’s a very difficult task to guide another positively when we are not in a very good feeling vibrational place ourselves, but add to that the belief that others must behave in specific ways before we allow ourselves to be happy….And that’s a recipe for….Well, being very controlling and unhappy.
If we are requiring others to behave in ways we find acceptable and make us feel good, we give others the job of making us happy rather than taking the power we’ve had since the day we made our way into this physical body (and before we came forward too!!) by using our mind to bring ourselves into a good feeling vibrational place that is not so reliant on what is happening around us or what others are doing.
Now, I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but everyone here is doing their best to make themselves happy, which doesn’t leave a lot to time for making everyone else happy which is the way it should be, for you cannot know exactly what will make others happy, that’s their job to figure that out and move towards it.
For those that are trying every which way to make others happy, they will eventually find it an impossible task to achieve consistently.

This being true, not much good comes from holding onto resentment and negative feelings about the way our parents did or did not raise us, for no matter what they did, most did the best that they could based on what they knew at that time, just as we are doing our best to raise our children now, based on what we know. It’s important to acknowledge the past cannot be changed, but how we feel about it now, can be changed and moved into a better feeling place if that’s what were wanting to do.
If we did receive our parents unconditional love as we were growing-up, it gives one confidence and self-esteem as it confirms what young ones know strongly as they come forward into their physical bodies, “I am a very good human being that deserves to be loved.” But if we felt we did not receive parental love, it can set up a mindset that goes something like, “If my mother or father doesn’t love me, maybe I’m not good enough?”
Of course this is not true, and most of us would agree that just because someone doesn’t love us, it doesn’t make us unlovable, but it matters more when we’re young as we’re more easily influenced, especially by those we hold in high regard and are strongly connected too.

So whether or not we felt loved and accepted or approved of by our parents while we were growing up, and even now, there comes a time when we must decide for ourselves that we are good enough and worthy human beings….
Because “who we really are” is all these things, and so much more….And when we know this is who we are, now we can see it in all others, and I say “That is so good!!”

And so it is….