Vibrational Place

Am I being selfish enough…..To look after myself???

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LightAngel
The word “selfish” has definitely come to mean a very negative quality that one would not usually be happy to be called, for when this is said it usually implies taking advantage of others for our own personal gain, a trait that most would agree is…..Well, not very nice!! (Remember, Law of Attraction)

When I speak about being selfish, which by the way we all are to different degrees, I’m talking about looking after our own needs and wants before others, but definitely not to the detriment of others, and often for the upliftment of all involved.

Do you think that’s selfish???
Yes, it most certainly is, but consider this for a moment. When did it become “not good” to look after ones own interests in a positive way? And I ask the question, who is going to look after you, if you will not?

We intentionally and specifically came into this physical world to decide and create for ourselves the life we’re wanting to live, so no other is able or can look after us better than we can. Every one of us has our own personal perspectives on life based on everything we’ve experienced, and unless someone has the ability to get inside us and know exactly how we’re thinking and feeling in relation to what we’ve experienced and what we’re wanting, they’re not in a better position than we are to decide what we should be doing.

That’s not to say we can’t get some good external guidance from outside of ourselves, especially if all parties involved are in a good feeling vibrational place about it, but the final decision is always ours after weighing up all the factors before us, and hopefully with the inclusion of our Non-Physical Inner Guidance.

For me, being selfish is another way of saying;

Nothing is more important to me than that I feel as good as I possible can at any given point in time. And because I know that I am the only one that can control how I am feeling, no matter what others around me are doing, I am going to do my best to move into the best feeling place I currently have access too. I know by making an effort to be in the best feeling vibrational place I can be in, I have the most benefit to offer others, so by looking after myself and making how I am feeling my top priority, now I am sharing the very best of me with everyone I come into contact with……

And that’s what I would call “A win, win situation!!”

And so it is….

I’ve sacrificed so much for this…….Uh oh!!

The Purest SoulLeave a comment

Sunset
If we feel like we’ve given up a lot for anything, whether it be our career, family, children, or friends, this can set us up for disappointment if the effort we feel we’ve put into such things is not reciprocated.

I often hear people say they do many things for their children and feel like their efforts are not appreciated.
And I say, if course our efforts are not appreciated….Children in these days are coming forward with a much stronger understanding of who they are, and who others are. They’re understanding whatever someone does is their choice and not so much about them, even if we are trying to tell them what we’re doing is only for their benefit. If we are feeling resentful about the things we are choosing to do for our children…..this is not ideal.

I know we all have to do thing’s sometimes that we’d rather not,(like going to children’s birthday parties!!!) And yes, maybe we’re doing it because we feel we should, but it’s important to make an effort to move into a better feeling place regarding whatever we’ve chosen to do otherwise it does leave one feeling quite resentful if appreciation for the unwanted effort we’ve made isn’t reciprocated.

From the viewpoint of Law of Attraction, if we are receiving back that which we are giving out through our vibration, and we are, when we feel annoyed or under appreciated, if we give these thoughts and actions plenty of air time and focus through our thought process the likelihood of receiving back appreciation for our efforts are not great. The more actions we take and feel annoyed, under appreciated, or begrudgingly do without improving our thought, the greater the possibility of attracting more circumstances where we may feel under appreciated!!

I know that may sound a bit, well…..annoying, but the truth is, even if we are doing something for someone else’s benefit, we must admit at some level, we are also doing it for ourselves, because we feel it’s the best choice we can make at that time. (even if it is a choice better two unwanted circumstances) It’s about taking responsibility for the choices we make and feeling as good as we can about them, rather than blaming others for “all that we have to do for them!”

Of course it’s wonderful when others appreciate what we do, it would be pretty unusual if we didn’t like to be appreciated, but it must be enough that it’s what we want to do, that it’s something we believe is good or of benefit to ourselves first, and then others.

Trying to make anyone feel guilty by telling them all the things we are doing “just for them,” is not usually a good idea and often encourages a greater lack of appreciation…..unless of course, we bring very unwanted consequences upon them.
Learning to appreciate that which we currently have rather than focusing on that which we do not yet have is a very important part of the creation process, for it’s our positive focus on all that we already have that is working well and good that is the easiest path to all we’re wanting in our future experience!! (Remember, Law of Attraction)

Appreciation is a difficult concept to teach to our children because they believe it’s their natural birthright to have anything they are wanting, and they aren’t too far off the mark with that knowing. I encourage this belief in my children (yes, I really do!!) and explain to them they also need to foster an attitude of appreciation for all they already have that is good rather than focusing on what they don’t immediately get. We also talk about the Law of Attraction and how we’re pre-paving our future experiences by how we are feeling now, and that making an effort to feel as good as we possibly can, especially in the face of unwanted circumstances, is the best we can currently do!
The best way we can hope to teach our children how to appreciate what they currently have is by being an example of appreciation ourselves. I’m not talking about over praising every tiny thing in an out of proportion general way, but more focusing on the good that we see all around us in very genuine and specific ways.

It’s not possible to fake true appreciation, and when we are looking for things to appreciate, it’s not long before the Universe delivers us circumstances that start matching that dominant vibration within us, and that is what one might say is…. “Choice”!!

And so it is….

Revenge is sweet…….Uhhhmmm, I think not……

The Purest SoulLeave a comment

LongGrass
Well….If we’re in a place where revenge feels better than where we currently are, the answer would have to be, temporarily, yes…..

But one thing is for sure, no matter where we’re sitting emotionally at the time of carrying out such actions, in the long-term, revenge never ever, ever achieves anything we are really wanting to experience in our lives. This is because the Law of Attraction is adding power too and returning too us what we are giving out, whether we are aware of this or not.

Don’t worry if you’ve had such thoughts in the past, I don’t think there’s probably many people that have lived that haven’t felt these types of emotions at one point or another. The question isn’t whether we’ve had revengeful thoughts or not, but whether we’ve moved ourselves into a better feeling place before we’ve taken any action against someone therefore creating even more power and momentum behind such thoughts, words and actions that will play out in full physical manifestational form if they are not moved into a better feeling vibrational place.

Seeking revenge for something when you feel someone has wronged you is very different to standing up for ones self, and that difference is all about the vibrational place we’re coming from when we carry out whatever actions we feel are necessary for us to come into a better feeling vibrational place.

If we want revenge, this always comes from a negative, not good feeling vibrational place. Even if the thought of it does feel good, it’s because the feeling of revenge is sitting in a better feeling place than where we currently are, whereas if we are standing up for ourselves from a positive feeling place, we have usually already found a better feeling place in relation to what has taken place but may still feel like some benefit may come by further discussion.
If this is what we are wanting to do, one needs to be very strong and focused about keeping a neutral or positive emotional place and be prepared to leave the situation or conversation if things get heated from the other side otherwise there’s a chance of getting pulled down to someone else’s not good feeling vibrational place and that’s not really ideal.

Even if this does happen, it’s not the end of the world because no matter what happens, we have the ability to bring ourselves into a better feeling vibrational place on every and any subject that’s important to us…..But it would also be true to say, it’s easier to bring our thoughts around to a better feeling place before something has physically manifested, because now we have to deal with that manifestation and all the momentum it’s created. Even once something has manifested, we can still improve our thought, it’s just easier to do before it’s a solid reality that’s staring us in the face.

Thoughts of revenge are often fuelled by a desire not to let someone get away with intentionally treating us badly or not nicely, and if actions are taken, it’s often the returning of what has originally been given out, an intention to hurt.
The problem with this is, we may be returning what was given out, but in like fashion, we will also be the receivers of what we have given out. None of us can get around the powerful Laws that govern this Universe, and for me it’s enough to know if people are doing such things, even if it’s personally directed towards me, they will be the receivers of their own creations through their thoughts, words and actions…..unless of course, they make an effort to move to a better feeling place, and I hope they do.

I know it’s not always easy, but by focusing on not nice things others may be doing and retaliating against them in a negative way means they have succeeded in bringing us to a place where through our own focus on what they have done, we are now in a similar not good feeling vibrational place as them, and for me, that is absolutely unacceptable…..
I use all my power and focus to not allow others to have control over how I am feeling. I know I cannot control what others are doing, or who they are currently choosing to be, but there is something I have 100% control over, and that’s myself and how I’m feeling, and I do my best to exercise that power always, but especially when unwanted circumstances arise I feel negative emotion about.

So by paying attention to how we are feeling and generally making a relaxed effort to feel better than how we currently are, especially if we’re experiencing negative emotion, as time goes we find ourselves in better and better feeling places with less time spent in the not so good feeling places…..

And that really is something worth feeling great about….Wouldn’t you say!!

And so it is….

Any communication is better than NO communication….Uhhhmmm???

The Purest SoulLeave a comment

P&CWater
Well,….That depends I suppose, on how the communication we’re having feels in comparison to not communicating.

One thing is for sure though, if we are not communicating within the close and intimate relationships where having with others in a mostly neutral or positive way, especially when challenges present themselves, long-term this is not that good.
Although good communication is the foundation for happy, good feeling, positive relationships, in the short-term it can sometimes be better to say nothing if we feel full of resentment or anger, for communicating with anyone from this place rarely achieves what ones wanting straight away or in the long term either.
By this I mean, when we’re in a strongly negative feeling place and expressing that outwardly towards another, we may feel some temporary relief at letting that emotion out, but there is no thoughts, words or actions that do not have consequences based on the Universal Laws we all live by.

Thoughts that are thought about for long enough produce words that we speak and actions that we take, and as those words and actions are all originally inspired from thought, the Law of Attraction responds to our focused thoughts by sending us people, places and circumstances that are matching the dominant feelings we have going on within us on the subjects that are important to us. (and any subject we’re feeling strong positive or negative emotion too, is a subject that’s important to us) So we always get back what we give out eventually, and it’s easy to see no ones wanting negative and unwanted circumstances in their lives!!

Sometimes we may think that this means we need to be nice to everyone or do nothing when others treat us in a not nice way….And I say “No way,” not retaliating against someone that’s not being very nice, or more to the point, not currently being much of who they really are, is about knowing that by doing such things as returning negative that’s been given out by others just brings that negative vibration into our own lives.

Although 99% of the time it is better to ignore such people or circumstances and move to a better feeling place by ourselves in our own time, sometimes we do need to stand up and say something regarding negativity that someone else is directing towards us, even if they haven’t expressed it in words or actions yet, especially if it’s someone you spend a lot of time with or that’s important to you. If we do feel the need to say something, a good plan is to speak from the best feeling place we can find at that time and to do our conscious best to stay as calm as we can during our interaction. If things get too heated and not good feeling, it takes restraint, but it’s best to leave the conversation.
Resentment and anger about anything within our relationship that is not moved into a better feeling vibrational place either by ourselves or by communicating with the other, eventually kills relationships and is often the beginning of the end if left to grow…..
Even if we do feel a relationship is at its end, it’s still important for us to move into a better feeling place regarding it…..For this ensures the relationships we have in the future will not carry the emotional resistance of our previous relationships.
Letting go of resistance always moves us closer to that which we are really wanting 100%, so let go of any resentment you maybe feeling towards others if you can….
And remember, you are doing it first and foremost for yourself, and if others gain benefit from it, that’s even better….

And so it is….

Facing your fears….Do you think that’s a good idea???

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WaterBabe
I’m quite unsure why we live in a time where many people encourage others to take action and do something they are extremely scared and fearful of doing….We would only do this if we were unaware of what we are really doing.

I’m not speaking about offering some positive encouragement when someone may be requiring a little boost of confidence in themselves to do what they are really wanting to do. I’m talking about trying to persuade someone to do something they are obviously and clearly not wanting to do because of an extreme fear they have.

To understand this, we need to know what the emotion of fear really is.
Fear, no matter what our fear is about or what it’s in relation too, is always communication from the Non-Physical part of us that has remained in the Non-Physical realm, letting us know….
What we are currently giving our attention too, or contemplating doing is a highly unwanted circumstance or situation that we have given focused thought to over time, that the Law of Attraction has responded too, offering up similar feeling circumstances giving us the opportunity to move into a better feeling vibrational place regarding it. (or to continue to feel fear and receive other circumstances that sit in this fearful vibrational place?)

Encouraging anyone to go against what they are strongly feeling, their own Inner Guidance based on all that they know and have experienced in this Physical life, is very poor advice at best, and I would say it’s a good idea to question ones motivations for doing such things. Just because we see something as an irrational or unwarranted fear based on our life experiences, does not make it so for others.
The most important thing to know is….the stronger our own or someone else’s reaction is to anything we are currently giving thought too, the closer we are to a full blown, here and now, physical manifestation that will match what we are feeling!!
Of course it feels good to give another some positive reinforcement, but to try very hard to get anyone to do something that goes against what they strongly feel….I don’t know? It’s better to gently encourage if we feel someone is close to being able to do what they are wanting, but to know ultimately, only they know how they are truly feeling and what’s best for them.

It’s better to tackle strong fear in small steps if we are wanting to help ourselves or anyone else move to a better feeling vibrational place regarding it.
If it’s a fear we don’t think about very often, we probably won’t be experiencing many physical manifestations regarding it, but if it’s something we think about often with increasingly strong emotions, we will probably be experiencing some physical manifestations that may not match what we are fearing exactly, but they will definitely have the same emotional feel about them.

I definitely wouldn’t suggest it’s a good idea to drag up everything we may be fearing and try to move it to a better feeling vibrational place, but if we are experiencing some fearful situations, this is a very strong indication that our fearful thoughts have gained enough power and momentum behind them through receiving plenty of air time through our own thought process that the Law of Attraction has responded to with similar feeling physical circumstances….This is the perfect opportunity to move our thought into a slightly better feeling place.

As with all things, it’s not usually possible to go from zero to hero (from strongly fearful to no fear) all at one time, and trying usually causes us to give up and resign ourselves to feeling bad if we don’t achieve the better feeling place we were reaching for.
It’s not that we can’t do it, it’s more that by the time we get to any place where we feel strong emotion, positive or negative for that matter, there is much power and momentum behind those thoughts that does take some time and effort to redirect into a different place.

No matter where any of us are….we are all doing our best based on what we know, and when we know better, we can do better….

And so it is….

Why is the Universe sending me these challenges???

The Purest Soul4 Comments

MoonAngel
The Universe is not judging who’s supposedly “good or bad” and sending us challenges, if we are experiencing challenges, they are coming through our own focused thoughts, whether we are aware of it or not! In other words, we are receiving many things in our lives both wanted and unwanted, but it’s not through luck or the Universe deciding we’ve had it “too good for too long” and need some not nice experiences in our lives, these things come through our own focused thoughts that we’ve given plenty of attention, over a prolonged period of time with strong emotions that the Law of Attraction has responded in-kind too.

The Universe and everything within it is governed by some very strong and consistent laws such as Gravity, Physics, and the powerful Law of Attraction to name a few, and it doesn’t matter whether or not we are aware of these Universal Laws for them to have an effect on every aspect of our lives, they just are….But it would be true to say, the more aware we are of these Laws, and the more consciously we apply them in our life, the better the results we’re achieving will be.

When challenges do arise in our lives, it’s usually because we’ve had some resistant, negative thoughts that need to be moved to a better feeling vibrational place in order for us to move into more of what we are really wanting, and to do so, our thoughts may need to be slightly redirected in some way.
It’s also important to know…. Even when we are sitting in a very good feeling vibrational place in relation to all we’re experiencing and wanting in our life, challenges will always present themselves to us. The idea of consistently and immediately being in vibrational alignment in a Physical environment where there’s so many contrasting experiences we may be living and observing, is probably a slightly unrealistic expectation and can set one up for disappointment.

Although this is true, being in a good feeling vibrational place does indicate the level or strength of the challenges we’ll face. It’s very unlikely that circumstances that are the manifestation of very resistant, not good feeling thoughts will come our way if we have been making a gentle effort to move our thoughts and feelings into a generally better feeling vibrational place in relation to what we’re currently experiencing and what’s important to us.

There is always a time difference between desiring something and getting ourselves in vibrational alignment with that which we have desired, but the more we are listening to the guidance from our Inner Being, the Non-Physical part of us that is letting us know through our emotions where we are in relation to whatever we’re wanting, the shorter the time period will be before the Physical manifestations we are wanting turn up.

Life is supposed to be good for all of us….And there is nothing that we have wanted or will desire in the future that we cannot achieve, but we do need to find the good feeling vibrational place of it.
This is the same for every physical being that has ever lived….And there’s nothing fairer in the world than this….

And so it is….

Love is all around us….

The Purest SoulLeave a comment

Love
Ok, so this was supposed to be a post with just a photo, that’s why I’ve got all that writing on there!!!
But then I wrote the post title and found myself not wanting to post it without saying something….Well that’s a surprise isn’t it….Hehehe!!

Many would disagree strongly and suggest I live in “Fairy Land” and would explain all the things they may have experienced in their lives or circumstances they may have observed others living that would demonstrate the exact opposite of love….And I agree, the opposite of love exists, with all the shades of emotional greys in-between, it is a great gift.
We’ve all come forward with the ability to create our lives through our focused thoughts and feelings, our vibration, and we’re able to create anything we focus on with strong emotion that’s held onto over time. As the Law of Attraction responds to our dominant vibrations, we will eventually experience the full physical manifestation of that focus, whether it is wanted or not.

Freewill would not truly be freewill if we only had the option to create positive circumstances in our lives, as it is in Non-Physical, although it does sound great if we’ve been experiencing many unwanted circumstances in our lives through not knowing how we are creating them!

The great story of Adam and Eve is an analogy of how we came from Pure Positive Non-Physical Energy, into our Physical environment, (Earth and the Human Body) an environment where polarities exist everywhere, unlike the Non-Physical realm where only Pure Positive Energy resides, a contrasting environment where we can choose either wanted or unwanted through the power of our vibration. It was not a falling from grace that birthed us into this Earthly time-space reality, but a choice of freewill, a powerful choice to come forward with the ability to experience the full spectrum of emotions and circumstances, with guidance from the Non-Physical part of us in the form of our emotions letting us know where we are in relation to all we’ve wanted in this life, and all previous lives for that matter too.

Love is in every particle of our Universe, and so is the opposite of it, for this is the only way we can truly know the difference between anything in our experience.
For example, if the temperature was warm in every place on this planet….How would you know it was warm without the ability to compare it against hot or cold? A very basic example I know, but I’m sure you can feel the truth of it.

And so the same goes for all possible experiences. There is an abundance or lack of everything you can possibly imagine, it’s just a matter of where we place our attention and where we set our general vibrational place that determines what we experience.

I know it can be difficult when we have not known this is how we’ve been creating our life experiences, but with Knowledge comes Power…. And whether we have known this for some time or are just coming to understand this now, each and every one of us has the ability to consciously and undeniably move ourselves into a slightly better feeling vibrational place NOW!!

And so it is….

I’ve been waiting for acceptance & approval from my parents for so long….

The Purest Soul1 Comment

KnowThySelf
Unfortunately many people are not allowing themselves to really feel happy because they are waiting for one or both of their parents unconditional love and acceptance.
And of course it’s wonderful when we feel we have their love and approval, but if this is not the case, it’s often because each generation, in their own right is different to previous generations, (that’s what they call progress I think!!) and for many people who are not very accepting of change or are wishing others were different to what they really are, (or maybe more obedient than they are) this can be difficult for them to accept and be happy about.
If you do not feel like you have received the love, acceptance or approval you thought your parents should have given you as you were growing up (and possibly presently too?) The most important thing to know is….Their inability to love unconditionally is far more about them than it is about you!

If our parents were not feeling good about something we were or were not doing, it was their inability or not knowing how to move themselves into a better feeling vibrational place that caused them to look on us with negative emotions or judgements, rather than us being wrong. Of course we did things that may not have been ideal, but that is the purpose they were there, to teach and guide us in a “positive way.”
It’s a very difficult task to guide another positively when we are not in a very good feeling vibrational place ourselves, but add to that the belief that others must behave in specific ways before we allow ourselves to be happy….And that’s a recipe for….Well, being very controlling and unhappy.
If we are requiring others to behave in ways we find acceptable and make us feel good, we give others the job of making us happy rather than taking the power we’ve had since the day we made our way into this physical body (and before we came forward too!!) by using our mind to bring ourselves into a good feeling vibrational place that is not so reliant on what is happening around us or what others are doing.
Now, I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but everyone here is doing their best to make themselves happy, which doesn’t leave a lot to time for making everyone else happy which is the way it should be, for you cannot know exactly what will make others happy, that’s their job to figure that out and move towards it.
For those that are trying every which way to make others happy, they will eventually find it an impossible task to achieve consistently.

This being true, not much good comes from holding onto resentment and negative feelings about the way our parents did or did not raise us, for no matter what they did, most did the best that they could based on what they knew at that time, just as we are doing our best to raise our children now, based on what we know. It’s important to acknowledge the past cannot be changed, but how we feel about it now, can be changed and moved into a better feeling place if that’s what were wanting to do.
If we did receive our parents unconditional love as we were growing-up, it gives one confidence and self-esteem as it confirms what young ones know strongly as they come forward into their physical bodies, “I am a very good human being that deserves to be loved.” But if we felt we did not receive parental love, it can set up a mindset that goes something like, “If my mother or father doesn’t love me, maybe I’m not good enough?”
Of course this is not true, and most of us would agree that just because someone doesn’t love us, it doesn’t make us unlovable, but it matters more when we’re young as we’re more easily influenced, especially by those we hold in high regard and are strongly connected too.

So whether or not we felt loved and accepted or approved of by our parents while we were growing up, and even now, there comes a time when we must decide for ourselves that we are good enough and worthy human beings….
Because “who we really are” is all these things, and so much more….And when we know this is who we are, now we can see it in all others, and I say “That is so good!!”

And so it is….

Don’t judge a book by its cover….

The Purest SoulLeave a comment

BigMoon
I think many would have a good idea what people mean when they say "Don't judge a book by its cover."
It's fairly obvious that you cannot know everything about a person purely by observing their physical appearance and this saying speaks to that truth by reminding us to avoid judging others too harshly or in a negative way before we've got to know them.
But that's where the truth of this statement ends.
Of course it's not nice to judge others harshly when you don't know a lot about them, but the idea that you will not take anything that you are observing with your own eyes, and what you may be feeling from them vibrationally into consideration when deciding whether you wish to interact with another person or not is…..Well, it's highly unlikely as this happens automatically, whether we are aware of it or not.
So our interpretation of another comes not just from what we are observing, ( hair, skin colour, clothing, cleanliness, presentation etc) not to underestimate what we are seeing, but also from a persons facial expressions, body language, and especially from what they are sending out vibrationally.
We all have a general vibrational signal that is being emitted from us in every moment we are in this physical body. (and when we are in the Non-Physical realm too….But that would require a post of its own!!)
Our general vibrational place is made up of all the thoughts and feelings we’ve ever had, although subjects we are currently focused on and things we feel very strongly about both positive and negative, will be sending out a stronger signal than subjects that are less important to us.
Whenever we come into contact with others, we’re picking up on their vibration to a certain extent, depending on how sensitive we are to how we’re feeling and how aware we are that this is happening.
Whatever we may be feeling when we’re observing anyone, but especially those we don’t know, will be a blending of their physical appearance, body language, and most importantly, their vibration. This is a positive occurrence, unless we make very negative judgements based on the information we are receiving.
When others are very different to ourselves, we often feel it very strongly and sometimes negatively, and we may assume, “there must be something wrong with that person,” otherwise why am I feeling not good when I look at them?
Whereas it’s usually an indication not that someone is “not good,” but that there will be a lot of differences between the two of you.
Now it’s true to say that it wouldn’t be much fun if we were all the same, but on the flip side of that, it’s not usually much fun to interact with people who are vastly different to ourselves either, especially if our core beliefs about life are at the opposite ends of the scale for this can make for some very not nice communication, and no one usually wants that!
Another factor about our physical appearance that’s often not considered is, what we see on the outside is always a reflection of what’s going on inside us and what we’ve been doing with our thought process, for it’s not possible to hide who you have been and who you are currently being, it’s out there for everyone to see, especially if you are holding negative thoughts and feelings about past experiences that the Law of Attraction is responding in-kind too, for this takes its toll on the mind and physical body!
So although it’s definitely not nice to judge others negatively by how they look, it’s important to acknowledge that we’re all receiving valuable information about the others we come into contact with that’s letting us know if it’s a good idea to communicate with them right now or not, and to guide people to not listen to the guidance they are receiving, is very poor advice at best.

For me, I get very strong feelings and information about others, and I do not feel the need to speak to those that are vibrationally a long way from where I am because I know they feel very uncomfortable around me, and that’s not nice for anyone including me.
Rather than trying to push relationships that aren’t a good match, it’s better to let those that are on the same wavelength to you come, for that is a coming together of two like-minded souls….And that is so good!!

And so it is….

Good relationships are all about compromise….Well, that depends???

The Purest SoulLeave a comment

MoonStar
Whether or not this statement is true or not for us, depends on what our belief or definition of compromise is, and what we believe a good relationship should be.

It would be fairly accurate to say that many people’s definition of compromise is having to make concessions or accept something less than what we may have truly been wanting, against ones will for the benefit of finding a suitable resolution or agreement of opinion, between two or more people.

Most pronounce this to be a wonderful thing that makes relationships work, and of course we cannot expect to have everything our own way if we are wanting to have a healthy and happy relationship where both parties are feeling valued and respected, but whether this is a positive aspect in the relationships we currently have, depends entirely on how much one may be having to “compromise” and how they feel when they’re doing this.

The most important factor that supersedes everything else is, “How am I feeling about the compromise I’m making now?” which will be influenced by many different variables such as;
~ How often am I compromising in this relationship?
~ How much does my partner compromise, is there a fairly equal reciprocation between both parties?
~ How strongly did I want things to work out how I envisioned?
~ How big is the compromise I’m making, and how long will it last for?
There will also be many other factors that will be specific to different situations and relationships.

As long as we’re interacting with other people, we will all need to navigate our way through differences of opinions of what we are wanting, but I don’t think it’s hard to know, if we feel we’re having to constantly compromise on circumstances that we feel strongly about, and that it isn’t evenly shared between both parties, this is when resentment can grow, especially if it ins’t addressed and talked about in the early stages of feeling resentful.

If resentment is not dealt with, it doesn’t usually go away by itself. Felt and caught in the early stages, it’s possible to easily move ourselves into a better feeling vibrational place by focusing on all the positive aspects of our situation, whereas if not dealt with, it grows in intensity with each similar experience that unfolds, until as many people say, “The last straw that breaks the camels back” often happens.

Although getting things out in the open can often be good, and can help us to move forward in a more positive direction, if our negative emotions have grown very strong with a lot of power and momentum behind them, it’s very hard to talk in a calm and productive way, and communication can become a bit….well, explosive!! It’s not the end of the world if this happens, once both parties have had time to calm down, that can be when some positive progress can be made, if both parties are still wanting a positive resolution.
If we’re feeling like we have to constantly compromise within our relationships, it is not ideal. The best option in these circumstances is to make an effort to move to a better feeling vibrational place rather than agreeing to what others want and then feeling resentful because we’ve had to give up something we’re wanting for the other.
If we’re finding it hard to move to a positive feeling place and cannot accommodate what another wants happily, it’s better to spend more time discussing the situation and trying to find a solution together that both will be happy with, because it’s always usually there, it’s just a matter of taking the time and effort to find it!

So although we may initially feel some negative emotion when we’re compromising, it’s not until we move all our thought regarding whatever we’re compromising about into a positive feeling vibrational place, that it’s no longer a compromise, now it is something we are wanting to do for ourselves, not just something we’re doing for someone else.
That’s a great vibrational place to be in, and that’s what I would call “A win, win situation!”

And so it is….